Erogenous zones are parts of the body that, when stimulated, elicit sexual arousal. Precisely which body parts are sources of sexual arousal is a very individual experience. The genitals are the most obvious erogenous zones, but many parts of the body not involved in reproduction are sensitive to sexual touch. The largest sensory organ for both men and women is the skin itself, especially the inner thigh area, the neck, the breasts and nipples, and the perineum. Other erogenous zones include the eyelids, the ears, and the shoulders. Many people also find that having their feet stroked is arousing. Stroking, caressing and massaging of erogenous zones can be titillating forms of sensual pleasure in and of themselves, or they can be invitations to further sexual activity.

The mouth, including the lips and tongue, for most people, is an area of high erotic potential. Kissing is one act that uses the sensitivity of this region in a sexually stimulating way.

The anus, rectum and buttocks are also potentially erogenous zones. The anus is highly sensitive to touch and the insertion of a finger, object or penis in the anus and rectum is part of some people's sexual activity. The buttocks are sometimes a target for spanking and stroking, which can feel very arousing to some people.

Deliberately exploring yourself and your partner is the first step in discovering which body parts are sexually responsive and the types of stimulation that feel best. Varying the pressure of touching and stroking the body from head to toe with different materials, such as a silk scarf, a soft brush, or a feather, may help to identify previously undiscovered erogenous zones.

Fantasy refers to the mental image of a person, object, or situation, often but certainly not always involving a sexual component. Fantasies may be based upon past experiences or may be entirely imaginary. Commonly they include a combination of both. It is normal for individuals to fantasize. Human sexuality is a dimension of social life that is often rich with many different sorts of fantasies. Sexual fantasies often entail mental scenarios involving persons other than one's regular partner and include sexual activities considered culturally inappropriate or unacceptable. People vary considerably in their ability to fantasize and in their enjoyment of this behavior. Fantasies may supplant reality for some or may serve as a poor substitute of sexual reality for others. Fantasies are often triggered by external stimuli, such as an attractive stranger or an erotic picture, movie, or story.

Having a fantasy about a particular sexual practice or activity does not mean that a person actually wishes to engage in that behavior or that he/she would enjoy the behavior. While fantasy may enhance actual sexual practices, it should not be assumed that a fantasized behavior represents an unconscious desire. Thus, some women fantasize about being overpowered or even raped by a man, but this does not mean they actually want to be raped. Similarly, some men fantasize about multiple sexual partners, but would find it emotionally difficult to maintain several simultaneous relationships. In recent years, there has been a greater openness about fantasy and a greater recognition oErotica is any material or device that arouses sexual interest or is used to enhance a sexual experience. Largely as a result of Gloria Steinem's 1980 article, the term has come to be used by most to refer to material that contains loving interaction that goes beyond the mere sexual. Commonly, erotica is in the form of sexually explicit writing or visual images such as photographs, drawings and films. Devices made to vary or enhance pleasure during sexual activity, sometimes referred to as sex toys, are also considered erotica.

Sexually explicit written and visual material dates back as far as ancient times and has been known to exist in numerous cultures. With the advent of the modern legal system some sexually explicit material - depending on its degree of explicitness and based on the interpretation of the observer - has been classified as obscene. The U.S. Supreme Court has set standards of legal obscenity, which are always implemented on a state or local level, but they are extremely difficult to apply on a case by case basis. There is no formula for deciding when something is erotica or obscenity (also called pornography), thus decisions are often left up to communities and individuals.

There are many reasons why people are interested in the use of erotica. Viewing and reading erotica provides a source of knowledge and comparison about sexual anatomy and behavior. Erotic materials are used by some to spark sexual arousal rather quickly or to prolong it, depending on the person's appetite at the time. Some people use erotic readings, pictures or movies to accompany masturbation. Like sexual fantasies, erotica triggers the imagination and allows people to deal with forbidden or frightening aspects of sex in the controlled environment of the imagination. Erotica gives people opportunities to rehearse in their thoughts acts that they hope to try or are curious about. Others use erotica primarily to heighten their sexual desire (but not as the main course), to turn on their partner, or simply to enrich a sexual experience with their partner.

Preference for one type of erotica over another is a matter of individual taste. Some people prefer the real-life action of films, whereas others prefer to let their imaginations expand on a drawing or photograph or find that stories or other written accounts of a sexually explicit nature offer greater erotic potential. Whatever the venue, there seems to be little difference in the sexual arousal that they help produce. In contrast, the content of erotica, rather than its style of presentation, does have a specific effect. People are more likely to be aroused by content to which they can relate, rather than by depiction of sexual acts that they find uncomfortable or offensive.

The sexual arousal that occurs with the use of erotica can be both psychological and physical. Many investigators have noted specific physiological changes in people while they watch erotic movies, read erotic passages, or listen to tape recordings of erotic stories. Men often experience erection and women undergo changes in vaginal blood flow or lubrication. In had been generally assumed that men responded more frequently and powerfully to erotica than women. However, research indicates that this is not necessarily the case. Both sexes are capable of responding to erotic material in much the same ways, although the type of erotica (style, content, plot) may be important in determining its turn-on potential. Furthermore, until recently, most erotica has been developed by men for men. This may be one reason why some women do not find traditional erotic materials as appealing as men do.

f how common this behavior is for both men and women. While fantasy often is treated as an individual behavior, partners sometimes "act out" shared fantasies to enhance their enjoyment of sex. Computers and the internet have contributed to a new arena of fantasy behavior, with extensive electronic exchange of pornography, interactive role-playing communication, fantasy-constructed chat rooms, and other forms of eroticized and non-eroticized fantasy communication among computer users.

Intercourse, or coitus, refers in a strict biological sense to the insertion of the male's penis into the female's vagina for the purpose of reproduction. Sexual intercourse is found among all mammalian species. Intercourse has traditionally been viewed as the natural endpoint of all sexual contact between a man and a woman. However, the meaning of the term has been broadened in recent years to include a wider range of behaviors and a wider set of motivations and intentions. In both popular and professional usage, intercourse now labels at least three different sex acts, two of which are not directly tied to conceiving a child. These three types of intercourse are: vaginal intercourse, involving vaginal penetration by the penis, possibly to the point of male ejaculation and female orgasm; oral intercourse, involving oral caress of the sex organs (male or female), possibly to the point of orgasm; and anal intercourse, involving insertion of the male's penis into his partner's anus. The latter two of these behaviors may be the endpoints of a sexual encounter or they may be acts of foreplay leading to each other or to vaginal intercourse. Moreover, intercourse is not limited to partnerships between individuals of opposite genders. Same-sex or homosexual encounters, involving oral or anal penetration or stimulation, are also referred to as sexual intercourse. Some writers also include digital (use of fingers or hands) intercourse or mutual masturbation as yet another form of intercourse. In addition to recognizing a wider array of behaviors as constituting different types of intercourse, sex researchers and therapists have come to recognize that humans engage in sexual intercourse for many reasons beyond procreation. Sexual intercourse is among the most intimate behaviors possible between two people, and, for many people, it is also one of the most pleasurable and emotionally satisfying.

All of the types of intercourse mentioned above may produce orgasm for one or both partners. Orgasm is a complex physical and emotional release that can last from a few seconds to over a minute. Generally, it is followed by a significant sense of well-being and both physical and emotional relaxation. While the experience of orgasm is generally similar among men and women, there are some differences. Male orgasm commonly follows a series of penile thrusts, rhythmic contractions of the prostate gland and the set of muscles surrounding the penis, testicle elevation, and ejaculation of semen from the penis. For almost all males, ejaculation is followed by a recovery period (that tends to grow longer with age) before it is possible to ejaculate again. Female orgasm is variable, ranging from a single brief period of mildly pleasurable contractions of the uterine and vaginal walls to multiple episodes (approximately 0.8 seconds apart) of physically intense waves that cover the entire body and can last for long periods of time.

Masturbation is the deliberate stimulation of one's own genitals to achieve sexual arousal and pleasure. It is done at least occasionally by a majority of both men and women. In one recent national study, 95 percent of men and 89 percent of women reported having masturbated. It is the first overt sexual act for the majority of men and women, although more women than men engage in sexual intercourse before they ever masturbate. Most men who masturbate tend to do so more often than women, and they are more likely to report always or usually experiencing orgasm when they masturbate (80 percent to 60 percent respectively). It is the second most common sexual behavior (coitus being first), even for those who have a regular sexual partner.

Most children - often from the time they are infants onward - find the occasional stimulation of their genitals sensually pleasing, but do not come to understand this behavior as "sexual" until late childhood or adolescence. During adolescence, the percentage of both sexes who report masturbating increases dramatically, especially for males. Most people continue to masturbate in adulthood, and many do so throughout their lives.

The term masturbation conjures up many myths about its damaging and debasing nature. Its negative images may be traced as far back as the word's Latin origin, masturbare, which is a combination of two Latin words, manus (hand) and stuprare (defile), thus "to defile with the hand." The built-in notion of shame and uncleanliness implied by the defiling portion of the word has remained in the modern translation - even though medical authorities have been in agreement for some time that masturbation causes no physical or mental harm. Nor is there any evidence that children who engage in self-stimulation are in any way harmed by it.

The fact that this important source of sexual pleasure is still regarded by some with guilt and anxiety is partly due to ignorance of the fact that masturbation is not harmful and partly due to centuries of religious teaching that it is sinful. In addition, many of us have received negative messages about masturbation from our parents or have even been punished when caught masturbating as children. The cumulative effect of these influences is usually confusion and guilt that is often difficult to sort out. About the only time masturbation can be harmful is when it becomes compulsive. Compulsive masturbation, like all other compulsive behaviors, is a sign of an emotional problem and needs to be addressed by a mental health specialist.

So, contrary to ancient and popular beliefs, masturbation does not lead to unbridled lust, does not make you blind or deaf, give you the flu, drive you crazy, grow hair on your hand, make you stutter, or kill you. Masturbation is a natural and harmless expression of sexuality in both men and women and a perfectly good way to experience sexual pleasure. In fact, some experts argue that masturbation improves sexual health by increasing an individual's understanding of his or her own body and of what is erotically pleasing, building self-confidence and fostering self-acceptance. This knowledge can then be carried forth to make for a more satisfying sexual relationship with one's partner, both through each partner's comfort with mutual masturbation, and because of the ability to tell each other what is most pleasing. It is a good idea for a couple to discuss their attitudes about masturbation and to calm any insecurities a partner may have if the other should sometimes favor masturbation over sexual intercourse. In some relationships, masturbation may be mutually acceptable. Done alone or in the presence of a partner, the act can be pleasing and add to mutual intimacy if it is not experienced as a rejection. Like most behaviors, without proper communication, the act of masturbation can be used as a sign of anger, alienation or displeasure with the way the relationship is progressing.

Overcoming society's negative stereotypes and one's personal feelings about masturbation can allow men and women the freedom to explore and experience their own sexuality in a private, satisfying manner. One word of caution: in keeping with the practices of safer sex, masturbation with a partner can be an enjoyable alternative to intercourse, as long as you avoid contact with your partner's semen or vaginal fluids, especially if you have any cuts or open sores.

Sex aids or sex toys are devices made to vary or enhance pleasure during sexual activity. They are used primarily on the genitals or around the genitals, but some can be used on other parts of the body as well. People use them when they are on their own or with partners. On the whole, people who use sex aids do not use them every single time they engage in sex nor do they always use the same aid on each occasion.

The list of sex aids is a long one. They are usually sold in special erotica shops or through mail order catalogues. Some of the more common ones include the following:

Vibrators. Vibrators are electrical machines powered by batteries or plugged into electrical outlets. They come in different sizes and shapes; some have variable speed controls to allow the user to personalize the intensity of the stimulation.

The more popular kinds of personal vibrators are battery powered, cylindrical or penis shaped in different diameters and lengths, and sometimes come with attachments for different parts of the body.

The sexual sensations produced by a vibrator can be both intense and rapidly felt. Vibrators must be used gently on sensitive body tissue. Some people use a towel between the skin and the vibrator to cut down on the intensity of the sensation. Using a water-based lubricant can also make a vibrator more comfortable and stimulating.

Vibrators, especially AC-powered models, are never to be used in or with water, and battery powered models may overheat if used for extended periods of time.

Ben Wa Balls. This device, which originated in the orient, consists of a set of two metal balls. One is solid and is placed in the vagina near the cervix; the other one is partially filled with mercury and is also placed in the vagina, near the first one. Any movement causes the mercury filled ball to hit the deeper one, spreading vibrations through the vaginal area. Women primarily use them on their own, but they can also be incorporated into sexual activity with a partner.

Cock Rings. A cock ring is a metal, leather, or rubber ring-shaped device, usually from 1 1/2 to 2 inches in diameter. The testicles and the erect penis are slipped through the ring, which fits tightly, putting pressure on the dorsal vein of the penis. The idea is that the cock ring will keep the blood that has engorged the penis from flowing out. The man will therefore retain his erection longer and, theoretically, be able to prolong his sexual activity. Some men also wear cock rings when they want their genitals to look larger under their pants. Proper fit is important so that the penis and testicles do not get bruised. Caution is needed not to wear the rings too tightly or for an extended period of time, since they act as a tourniquet limiting blood flow and can cause severe damage to the genitals.

Erotic Creams, Lotions and Oils. These come in various scents and flavors and are primarily designed to make caressing and massage more sensuous, though some are used as lubricants for intercourse. The sensations and scents of creams, lotions and oils on the skin can be arousing for some people. The flavor of the cream or oil is often important for couples who want to have oral sex or like to kiss their partner's body all over.

French Ticklers. French ticklers are devices that fit over the penis and are designed to tickle and increase sensation in the vagina during intercourse. These devices are pre-shaped (unlike condoms, which come rolled up) and their surfaces are equipped with ridges and small probes. French ticklers can be reused after thorough washing. It is important to note that while they fit over the penis in a fashion similar to condoms, they are NOT birth control devices

Leather Garments and Accessories. Leather has a distinctly erotic appeal for some people. It is a common element in sadomasochistic (S&M) fantasies used to express dominance . Some people get excited if threatened by someone who is clothed in leather or who is using leather implements. The dominant person (sadist) in these scenarios also usually derives pleasure from the wearing or use of leather. Leather is also used in bondage and discipline (B&D) in the form of harnesses or straps.

Masturbators. These are devices with soft, usually latex sleeves, often designed to resemble the female vagina, into which a man can place his erect penis. If this sexual aid is an electrically or battery powered model, it can be controlled by the user to operate at varying desired speeds to create a rhythmic motion, stimulating the man to reach orgasm and ejaculate.

Penis Extenders. A penis extender is a hollow penis-shaped device that is placed over the end of the penis to make it seem larger. Usually it is held in place by straps or a harness that goes around the waist.

The use of sex aids and sex toys is not readily accepted by all. For the most part sex toys are designed solely to increase pleasure. Because our society is in conflict over the rightness of sexual pleasure, it is not surprising that sex toys are subject to numerous myths and controversies. Some of the more common misconceptions are: that the use of sexual aids is a sign of being a pervert; that using sexual devices in a relationship is a sign that the relationship is not going well; people who use sexual aids become addicted to them; and homosexuals use sex aids more that heterosexuals do. None of these, of course, is true.

Nonetheless, many people feel ambivalent about using sex aids. They may feel that using mechanical devices during intimate moments is unnatural, depersonalizing or replacing their partner. While these concerns may have merit, it is generally not simply the use of sex aids that contributes to ill feelings, but how they are used and what their use means to an individual or to a couple. If the use of sexual aids objectifies or depersonalizes sexual experiences, there may be a problem in the relationship that requires attention. If people are using sexual devices as a crutch because they feel inadequate or inferior, then their negative feelings may need to be explored. Under circumstances like these, the use of sexual devices can be unhealthy substitutes for interpersonal relationships.

Some couples find that a healthy relationship can comfortably accommodate the addition of sex toys. Others may find that after some experimentation they prefer to do without them. Still others may feel that their sexual value is threatened by the use of sex aids. An insecure individual may wonder if his or her partner is using a sex aid because of dissatisfaction with him or her.

These issues and any others that may be raised as a result of introducing sexual aids may be seen as an opportunity for individuals and couples to explore their feelings and discover the problems in their relationships. It is important to consider, however, that using sex aids is normal and not using sex aids is normal. It is simply a matter of individual preference.

Although the majority of sex aids and toys are sold to people who use them just to enhance their pleasure, some can be used in the treatment of sexual problems. Videos, audiotapes and written material can be helpful in assisting an individual or a couple to overcome anxiety or lack of information. Also, sexual devices can be particularly helpful for some disabled people whose disability inhibits their sexual expression. In order to improve communication and intimacy, marital and sex therapists suggest that couples who have concerns or fears about the use of sex aids or toys should be encouraged to talk openly with their partner about their feelings.

As part of a broader sexual interaction, foreplay is considered to be an essential component that stimulates and prepares the body and the mind/emotions to move through the phases of the sexual response cycle in preparation for orgasm. Touch is a key element of foreplay because the surface of the body is covered with many receptor cells (nerve endings) that transmit pleasurable sensations to the brain. Some parts of the body, particularly the clitoris, penis, nipples, fingertips, palms, lips, tongues, and soles of the feet have more densely packed nerve endings. These sites are sometimes called the erogenous zones, although, in fact, the entire surface of the skin has been referred to as the body's largest sex organ because all forms of pleasure during foreplay are transmitted through the skin. Consequently, caresses, hugging, holding hands, and related acts of physical intimacy, in addition to expressing key cultural meanings about caring, safety, and arousal, are important acts of foreplay. Many people also find light touching or tickling of the surface of the skin to be especially stimulating. Back rubs and massages(with or without massage oil or other artificial lubrication) are considered to be very erotic by some. Others prefer more intensive hand to body caressing and exploration of the erogenous zones, commonly referred to as petting.

Individuals vary considerably in terms of which of the potential erogenous zones they find to be most sensitive. Some people like to have their neck stroked or kissed, an experience that conveys great pleasure and sexual excitement. Others enjoy having their fingers and/or toes nibbled or sucked. Many people find kissing to be the fundamental act of foreplay. Kissing involves a range of behaviors from very light lip-to-lip contact, to what is often referred to as "deep" or French kissing, in which partners rub their tongues against each other and over other mouth surfaces. Generally, kissing is considered to be an extremely intimate and pleasurable act because it involves direct face-to-face contact and because the mucous membranes that cover the lips and mouth have an especially dense supply of nerve endings. Some individuals are particularly sensitive around their ears, inner thighs, or lower stomach, while breasts and nipples (for both women and men) often are highly preferred places for caressing and oral stimulation. In addition to various sites around the body, most people are quite responsive to manual or oral contact with their pubic area, although the precise spot that is most arousing varies. For men, the underside of the full length of the penis, the head of the penis, the scrotum, or the area between the end of the scrotum and the anus (called the perineum) are often quite sensitive. Oral stimulation and sucking of these areas is referred to as oral sex. Oral stimulation of the penis is called fellatio. For women, the clitoris, vulva, and surrounding areas are especially sensitive. Oral stimulation of these areas, especially to the point of orgasm, is known as cunnilingus . There has been considerable discussion in recent years of various highly sensitive spots within the woman's vagina. The most discussed is called the G-spot, named after its discoverer, Dr. Ernst Grafenberg. It is a small location inside the vagina on the anterior wall just behind the pubic bone. Stimulating this site is reported for some women to set off the production and ejaculation-like expulsion of fluid from the Skene's gland, the female counterpart of the prostate gland. For both women and men, anal stimulation may be highly stimulating (although others may find manual, oral,or penile stimulation of the anus to be repulsive).

It is sometimes said that the human body's most erogenous zone is the mind. Foreplay, as a result, is not merely an issue of physical stimulation but also one of emotional and mental stimulation. Some people, for example, are stimulated by the physical location and setting in which foreplay occurs. For some, public displays of affection are highly erotic. Most people are also responsive to verbal stimulation and can become aroused by compliments and strong expressions of affection and caring. Some have personal fantasies about particular locations or activities that they find highly stimulating (e.g., a warm fireplace on a cold night). Consequently, arranging locations or the role-playing of particular desired interactions (sometimes in costume) may be incorporated into foreplay.

Some fantasies may involve activities or circumstances, such as acts of dominance or submission, that are only pleasurable as fantasy and would be otherwise unacceptable. Generally, these activities require open communication, a fair degree of disinhibition, and a willingness to appease one's partner. For some people, even light to moderate pain may be stimulating. Biting or light scratching are common acts of foreplay, but some people prefer spanking or other forms of light physical punishment. Bondage is also considered quite arousing by some people. Acceptance or rejection of these behaviors varies, and unless a behavior is mutually enjoyable it will not contribute to providing the pleasure and sense of deep relaxation that is the central function of foreplay in human sexual interaction. Various rubber and electrical devices (such as vibrators), sometimes called "sex toys," have become popular in recent years. These are readily available in many areas at stores that specialize in adult merchandise. Generally, these stores also sell sexually explicit magazines and videotapes, which some couples incorporate into their foreplay activities.

The basic ingredients of foreplay are physical and mental/emotional stimulation, trust, and the expression of caring. Acts of foreplay that some individuals or couples find highly erotic may be completely unacceptable to others. Consequently, open discussion, sensitivity, and acceptance are vital to a healthy approach to foreplay.

Pornography is broadly defined as written or visual material that stimulates sexual feelings whose primary purpose is to arouse the observer or reader. It is also referred to as porn, smut and obscene material. The actual term "pornography" comes from porneia, the Greek word for prostitute, and means "the writings of and about prostitutes".

Defining the type of material that qualifies as pornography is more difficult. It is a relative term, subject to interpretation based on people's opinions. Standards of obscenity have been defined legally in a consistent way. Technically, pornography is not illegal. Sexually explicit material that is judged in violation of the penal code is defined as obscene. These works are often called "hard core pornography", but even that is not illegal unless tested by the courts and found to be obscene. The U.S. Supreme Court arrived at a definition of obscenity in the 1957 case of Roth vs. United States, and a number of lower courts have added their definitions since. Broadly speaking, erotic material is legally obscene if, for the average person, 1) its predominant appeal is to a prurient interest in sex; 2) it is contrary to the contemporary standards of the community; 3) it is without social value, or judged to be without artistic, literary, or scientific value.

These standards may be helpful to an extent, but they are extremely difficult to apply in any objective way. For one thing, standards vary from community to community and judgments about the artistic or literary value of material cannot be made by the use of a simple formula. Whereas hard core pornography is understood to be strictly for commercial use, with no pretense to artistic merit, works of art are sometimes claimed to be obscene despite the defense of artistic value.

Much of the controversy surrounding pornography is related to society's concern about how pornography affects people. One common worry is that the use of pornography promotes sex crimes and that sex offenders are avid consumers of obscene material. Research, however, does not show any consistent pattern. Data from studies conducted in the 1970s and1980s have consistently shown that the use of pornography is not related to an increase in sex crimes and that sex offenders in general have had significantly less exposure to pornography than non-offenders. Some later work in this area has not agreed with these earlier findings.

Another popular belief is that only perverted individuals would be interested in pornography. Findings from the historic Kinsey study showed that between 14 and 60 percent of females and between 36 and 77 percent of males were stimulated by viewing sexy movies, reading and hearing erotic stories, and viewing pictures, drawings or other portrayals of sexual activity. The Redbook survey (1974) reported that 60 percent of the 100,000 married women they surveyed had seen a pornographic movie, and 42 percent of these women had used pornography in their sexual practices at least occasionally. When the magazine Psychology Today asked 20,000 readers whether they had ever used erotic material for arousal, 92 percent of the male respondents and 72 percent of the females reported that they had. In 1970, the U.S. Commission on Obscenity and Pornography conducted one of the few scientific interviews of adults in the U.S. regarding pornography. Eighty-four percent of the men and 69 percent of the women indicated that they had used such material at some time. Finally, the tremendous popularity of magazines such as Playboy, Penthouse and Hustler provides undeniable testimony to the widespread use of erotica.

Furthermore, the U.S. Commission on Obscenity and Pornography reported that ordinary people did not change their types of sexual practice or values about what was acceptable as a result of viewing pornography. It also reported that there was a general increase in sexual activity within the 24-hour period after viewing pornography, but it was generally with the regular partner, or in the case of those without a partner, masturbation. It is noteworthy, however, that neither the Commission nor the authors of the other studies observed the effects of continuing exposure to pornography over a period of years. Thus it is not known what, if any, differences would be evidenced in the long run.

Another important concern about pornography is that some types portray women in a degrading, dehumanizing and exploitive manner. And, in fact, men are done a disservice when they are portrayed as interested only in sex (the more unusual the better), always ready for sex (with extraordinary anatomy and endurance), but incapable of sensitivity and tenderness. Some men may not object to this characterization, but most women do not appreciate the way some pornography depicts their gender as objects serving men.

Perhaps one reason why some pornography exploits women is because, throughout history, it has mainly been created by men for men. Erotic works from the Stone Age on reveal typical male sexual interests and fantasies, and depict various interpretations of the idealized woman. It is principally for this reason that pornography has been assumed to arouse women less than it does men. But with the contemporary phenomenon of women creating pornography, the question arose of whether men and women respond differently to pornographic material. Kinsey speculated that there could be some neurophysiological reason for a difference, but a West German research team studied the responses of men and women to pornography and found them to be comparable emotionally, physically and behaviorally. Psychologist Julia Heiman's work found that there are both sex differences and other differences in responses, but women are not inherently less capable of responding to pornography. Women and men, she found, respond more to that which they like.

As with many issues, our society is not in agreement about the topic of pornography. Pornography is mass produced and widely available, yet is just as widely distrusted and condemned. We have laws against obscenity but cannot define it. We believe that somehow pornography is harmful, yet can find no evidence of harm. On the one hand, our culture seems unable to satisfy its demand for pornography; on the other hand, many people believe it should be controlled in some way for the general good. It would most likely require a major cultural shift for society to feel comfortable about repealing all legislation against pornography. Equally, it would take as large a shift to enforce total prohibition. Ultimately, it is an individual's personal beliefs that determine what is acceptable and what is obscene.

G-spot (or Grafenberg spot) is a dime to half dollar sized, localized area of especially high sensitivity, situated beneath the surface of a woman's vagina on the wall toward the front of her body. While location varies, the G-spot is typically located about half way between the pubic bone and the cervix, about three inches into the vagina.Researchers have found that some women experience sensitivity more generally along the upper vaginal wall, rather than in a definable spot. Because the G-spot is beneath the surface of the vaginal wall, it must be stimulated indirectly through the vaginal wall. Many women reportedly notice an urge to urinate when the spot is initially stimulated, but find continued stimulation (with an empty bladder), very pleasurable. Some go on to experience orgasm, and some expel a fluid along with the orgasmic contractions.

Named by researchers Perry and Whipple in honor of the German gynecologist Ernst Grafenberg, who first wrote about it, the G-spot's existence, as well as its location, has been a source of great debate and controversy. Grafenberg himself identified the sensitive area as the point where the urethra (the tube that carries urine from the bladder) runs closest to the top of the vaginal wall. Perry and Whipple argue that the area is located higher up along the vagina, while Israeli sexologist Dr. Zwi Hoch, claims that the entire anterior wall of the vagina, rather than one particular spot, is filled with nerve endings capable of producing intense arousal when stimulated. Other research seems to show that the G-spot does not exist at all for some women. Also under debate is the composition of the fluid (sometimes called female ejaculant) that is expelled by some women during orgasm from G-spot stimulation. Some researchers claim that it is urine; others assert that it is a substance corresponding to seminal fluid in males (but without the sperm, of course). Not all women with a G-spot ejaculate, and those who do, do not necessarily ejaculate with every G-spot orgasm.

It is relatively difficult for a woman to explore the G-spot on her own because most do not have fingers long enough to reach it. Inserting an appropriate, safe, clean object into the vagina is probably required for self-exploration. Or working with a trusted partner can make for enjoyable self-discovery of a woman's G-spot. Through experimentation a woman can learn the type of stimulation that feels best to her. Penile stimulation is often more effective when done through steady and prolonged pressure, rather than with the usual penile thrusting, because the G-spot generally needs an intense and quite localized pressure. Gradually increasing the pressure will help identify the optimal pressure for erotic pleasure without causing pain. Some women are able to climax simply as a result of this pressure; in others it may act to significantly heighten arousal. Rear entry and female on top positioning for intercourse can be effective ways to produce more direct stimulation.

"Blue balls" is a slang term referring to testicular aching that may occur when the blood that fills the vessels in a male's genital area during sexual arousal is not dissipated by orgasm. When a man becomes sexually excited, the arteries carrying blood to the genital area enlarge, while the veins carrying blood from the genital area are more constricted than in the non-aroused state. This uneven blood flow causes an increase in volume of blood trapped in the genitals and contributes to the penis becoming erect and the testicles becoming engorged with blood. During this process of vasocongestion the testicles increase in size 25-50 percent.

If the male reaches orgasm and ejaculates, the arteries and veins return to their normal size, the volume of blood in the genitals is reduced and the penis and testicles return to their usual size rather quickly. If ejaculation does not occur there may be a lingering sensation of heaviness, aching, or discomfort in the testicles due to the continued vasocongestion. This unpleasant feeling has popularly been called blue balls, perhaps because of the bluish tint that appears when blood engorges the vessels in the testicles.

The condition usually does not last long and the level of pain associated with blue balls is usually minor and can be exaggerated. Most men have been socialized to ejaculate when they get an erection during sexual activity. Failure to ejaculate and to feel orgasm often adds frustration and disappointment to the reality of the physical sensation. Men who believe that they should ejaculate every time they have an erection are likely to exert pressure on their partner to proceed with sex without taking her feelings into consideration. Some men find that masturbation is a viable solution and some men are realizing that ejaculation is not a requirement in every sexual situation. This attitude allows both men and their partners to relax more and to learn that pleasure and meaning can exist without having to reach ejaculation and orgasm during every sexual encounter.

Men are not alone in experiencing the discomfort of unrelieved vasocongestion. Women's genitals also become engorged with blood during sexual arousal and, like their male counterparts, women can experience pelvic heaviness and aching if they do not reach orgasm.

Cunnilingus is a form of oral sex involving mouth contact with the vagina. The term cunnilingus comes from an alternative Latin word for vulva (external female genitals), cunnus, and from the Latin word for licking, lingere. In cunnilingus, the labia, the clitoris and/or the vaginal area are licked, kissed or gently sucked. The feeling of the mouth and tongue on the genitals can be very pleasurable for some people. Cunnilingus can be a part of couples' foreplay, meant to heighten sexual arousal, or it can be the sole activity. Some women also experience orgasm by means of cunnilingus. Though cunnilingus is common among heterosexual and homosexual couples, not everyone engages in it. Some people, men and women, simply do not feel comfortable with it. Most reservations tend to center around three issues: first, that cunnilingus in unhygienic; second, that it is taboo; third, that cunnlingus is not a true expression of femininity or masculinity.

HYGIENE. Women sometimes worry that their genitals will have an unpleasant odor or that there may be germs on their genitals which would be passed on to their partners. Genital odor can be taken care of by routine washing and many people find natural genital scents stimulating. As far as transmission of germs or disease, cunnilingus between healthy, disease-free people is entirely safe and clean. No disease is passed by cunnilingus that wouldn't be transmitted by any other kind of sexual contact.

TABOO. Historically and currently, oral sex, including cunnilingus, has been frowned upon in some cultures and by some religions. It is prohibited in some cultures and even illegal. Underlying the social disapproval and legal strictures are powerful age-old religious prohibitions against oral-genital contact. Centuries of religious scholars have believed and preached that oral sex is unnatural and against divine law. Whether because genital-mouth contact was not a procreative act or because it was erroneously believed to be strictly a lesbian activity, cunnilingus was officially prohibited. In our culture the non-procreative aspect is the most pertinent in that it is the procreative potential of sex that has traditionally transformed it from bad to good in the eyes of many religions. The weight of religious teachings throughout history has had a strong influence on legal and social rules. Many states in the United States still have laws about what are termed "unnatural acts" which include prohibitions on mouth-genital contact. Technically these laws still remain on the books in some states, but are rarely enforced. As the influences of religion on government have diminished, society's experiences with sexual practices have shown that these prohibitions were unnecessary and that cunnilingus is a safe and natural sexual practice between consenting adults.

Sex Therapy involves the therapeutic treatment of sexual disorders such as impotence, premature ejaculation, retarded ejaculation, hypoactive sexual desire, painful coitus, and orgasmic disorders. These problems, while not subjects of polite conversation until relatively recently, have been found to be extremely common, and further, to be sources of considerable emotional distress and interpersonal conflict in relationships. Masters and Johnson , pioneers in the sex therapy field, have stated that at one time or another half of all marriages have significant sexual problems. Other studies have suggested that at some point in their lives 10 percent of women are anorgasmic, 7 percent of men are impotent, and 18 percent of men suffer from premature or retarded ejaculation. Inhibited sexual desire, a condition characterized by loss of interest in sex, is thought to trouble one in five adult women during their lives. Additionally, surveys of married couples find that over half complain of encountering interferences that block their full enjoyment of sex.

While universally emphasizing correcting sexual misinformation, the importance of improved partner communication and honesty, anxiety reduction (including fear of performance failure), sensual experience and pleasure, and interpersonal tolerance and acceptance, sex therapy includes three different levels of intervention to address the various sexual problems mentioned above, depending on the nature and causes of the problem involved. Sex therapists believe that many sexual disorders are rooted in learned patterns and values. These are termed psychogenic disorders. As they are growing up, children observe interaction between their parents and others and are the objects of various messages about their sexuality. Conflict or other problems, including sexual problems in marriages, can be transmitted to children and result in the formation of unhealthy attitudes about sex, about sex organs, or about the body in general. Moreover, parents, religious institutions and societal norms may convey very repressive attitudes about sexuality that contribute to the formation of diverse sexual dysfunctions. Problems of this nature are believed by sex therapists to constitute the majority of sexual disorders. An underlying assumption of sex therapy is that relatively short-term outpatient therapy can alleviate learned patterns, restrict symptoms, and allow a greater satisfaction with sexual experiences. In cases where significant sexual dysfunction is linked to a broader emotional problem such as depression or substance abuse, intensive psychotherapy and/or pharmaceutical intervention may be appropriate. Substance-induced sexual dysfunction, for example, can involve loss of interest in sex, inability for the male to become erect, impaired orgasm, and pain during intercourse. Various medications also can produce symptoms of sexual dysfunction. Finally, there are a number of medical conditions that can cause sexual dysfunction, including various neurological problems (e.g., multiple sclerosis), endocrine conditions (e.g., diabetes mellitus), vascular conditions, and several different infections. These are termed biogenic conditions.

In his book Human Sexual Response, Lief described five sexual response phases: desire, arousal, vasocongestion, orgasm, and satisfaction. Sexual dysfunction can occur in any of these areas. If the dysfunction is a chronic problem, such as a woman who has always experienced pain during intercourse, it is called primary dysfunction. If the dysfunction is situational, such as a man who previously had no difficulty achieving erection but begins to experience this problem at the beginning of a new relationship, it is called secondary dysfunction. Primary or secondary dysfunction can occur in any of the five domains of sexual response. Dysfunctions associated with sexual desire include hypoactive sexual desire disorder and sexual aversion disorder. In the first of these, the individual has a persistent absence of sexual fantasies or desire for participation in sexual activity. In the second disorder, there is a complete or near complete aversion to contact with a partner's genitals. These conditions often reflect serious emotional problems, although individuals may be responsive to intensive psychotherapy combined with sexual therapy.

Sexual arousal disorders are found in both males and females. Males may be interested in sex but suffer from impotence or erectile dysfunction, while females are unable to maintain the lubrication-vaginal swelling response of normal sexual excitement. In their book, Human Sexual Inadequacy, Masters and Johnson asserted that 90% of impotency cases were psychogenic in origin. Even in older men, they maintained, emotional issues rather than medical problems are the main causes of impotence. Masters and Johnson reported great success in treating impotence with short-term therapy, especially when it had its roots in fear of failure and performance anxiety. Since their work in the late 1960's, continued medical research and improved diagnostic techniques indicate that only 40% to 50% of male impotence is caused solely by psychogenic factors.

In males, orgasmic dysfunction includes both premature and retarded ejaculation (in which ejaculation may be completely absent despite stimulation and arousal). Retarded ejaculation may have psychogenic as well as organic causes, or may be a consequence of drug abuse or a side effect of a medication. Unlike retarded ejaculation, which is rare, premature ejaculation is fairly common. Therapy involves anxiety reduction and ejaculation control training. One approach to help with ejaculatory control is called the Valsalva Maneuver . Using this procedure, when a man senses he is about to ejaculate, he holds his breath and flexes his muscles as if he is having a bowl movement. Performed correctly, this procedure enables the man to delay ejaculation and allows him to feel in more control of his body. The Valsalva Maneuver is best tried in the context of a therapy which can also address the male or couple's anxieties about the experience. Inhibited female orgasm, a fairly common problem, is often caused by emotional or relationship problems. Sex therapy for this problem addresses underlying misinformation, psychological inhibitions, conflicting beliefs and values about women's right to sexual pleasure, and related issues. Partners counseling may be effective in addressing communication, control, and sensitivity issues, while couples sexual training can address sexual interaction issues. Couples may be provided with instruction on alternative sexual arousal and satisfaction behaviors such as the Sensate Focus technique, given home assignments to practice the new strategies, and prompted to report outcomes to their therapist. Sometimes groups of couples with similar problems are brought together to provide support for open communication and behavioral change.

Source : Adult sexuality web